The Three Most Helpful Tips I Received as a New Mom | Wooster, OH Newborn Photographer
Everyone always has something to say
When I was pregnant with our first child five years ago, I noticed this trend when speaking with just about anyone; they felt the need to throw out all kinds of "advice" and tell me exactly how they thought I should parent. Things like "don't hold your baby too much or they will never learn how to sleep on their own, if they nurse for more than fifteen minutes then they are just using you as a pacifier and not actually eating," and the list could go on. I know they meant well but when every piece of advice is contradictory it can make your head spin. It was overwhelming to say the least, and caused me to question every decision I was making trying to care for this new baby of ours. Now that we have three kids my heart goes out to those new parents who are trying to decipher what tips are actually beneficial and what old school methods should just be brushed over. This post isn't meant to tell you how I believe you should parent, but what advice I heard that actually worked for us.
#1 You can never "spoil" a baby, especially a newborn
I truly wish I would have listened to this one sooner. I was so worried with our first child that I was going to ruin her forever that I didn't enjoy those early days of snuggling and contact napping. The moment she would fall asleep I would lay her down in her bassinet because everyone told me I shouldn't hold her when she was sleeping, because she would never learn to sleep on her own. I come to tell you that this is on fact not true (at least with my kids). In fact, the more I held my babies the better they slept. Instead of waking up after twenty minutes, they slept for hours. I was driving myself crazy trying to get her to sleep alone when in fact I should have been listening to her and just holding her. And I can assure you that she is now almost five and sleeps wonderfully in her own bed. I just wish someone would have been there to tell me it was perfectly okay to hold her as she slept.
#2 Take them outside or put them in the bathtub
Some days there is just no amount of consoling, rocking, shushing, nursing, etc. that will calm them down. Babies cry a lot and it can become very overwhelming and frustrating when you can't figure out what is wrong. Getting outside or putting them in the warm bath was some kind of magic with my kids, and still is to this day. Fresh air is beneficial to the both of you on those days where nothing else is working. If the weather is less than ideal, the bath is just as good. They become relaxed and the warm water is calming for them. I can remember putting our first in the bathtub one day when nothing else I did could settle her. The moment she was in the water she stopped crying. I was terrified to take her out because I didn't want the crying to start again, but she was a new baby when I took her out.
#3 Stop Googling everything
As a new mom trying to figure everything out for the first time, I fell victim to Google. I was searching everything under the sun about my newborn and freaking myself out. From how often she should be nursing to how to get her to sleep. I was listening to "experts" on the internet instead of my own intuition. It only made my anxiety and depression worse because I felt that there was something wrong with my baby since she wanted to eat more frequently than every three to four hours and didn't follow the typical wake windows (if you're a mom you know what I'm talking about). News flash to me, nursing newborns eat way more than every three ours and it is okay if they are awake for 47 minutes instead of 45 :). The moment I finally convinced myself to stop searching and follow my baby's cues it because much easier and I was finally able to relax a bit.
There is other advice that I received that was also beneficial, by these were by far the best. You should ultimately follow your own intuition and parent how you feel you should. Because after all this is your family and your child and you get to choose what your household and parenting style looks like.
